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Friday, April 25, 2008

frikken frikken frikken frikken VIRUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

nuff said...

four full days off work including last sunday... and now a 24 hour wide awake day on the go..
On top of that, at this very moment I'm 24,000kr outta pocket due to cyberspace fraud...
I never ever thought I'd be that gullible, but yep, ripped off 4000 dollars, money nicely sent wire to wire with a "thanks very much attached"...
Still could be worst, at least I've got my health...oh, thats right, I don't even fucking own that anymore as I obviously sold my soul the last time I was at the crossroads with the fender...
Anyhow, anywhere and anywot? just see how that pans out, its a lotta cash but things can always be worst.I hope.... it could be 240, know, is the glass half empty or half full...yeah, like fuck off I dont need pedagogisk pearls of wisdom when facing an internet fraud...
Found these piccies of flu virus, looks like something jacque Cousteau would pull out of a sharks arse to be honest..who knows, maybe thats where they come from, maybe the garden gnome shark is tired of getting his flippers hacked off so some jap can get a hard-on and prove to his wife that his knob gets bigger than 4cm if he eats the age old potency remedies...dear oh dear..
Amazing isn't it. frikken amazing.
In a couple of years , young people everyday will have to enjoy the stenches and q's to Burger king at the local zoo to see any frikken live animal, doped up to its eyeballs and probably fed quorn as it "just wouldn't be right to feed it real meat"...cos the penguins really do enjoy their daily walk through the bubblegum and half lit cigarettes on the ground..hypocrits! Zoo keepers...nope, give them back their own country land, fence them in and let them roam, not stick them into what is in effect a frikken skatepark halfpipe made of concrete!!!
ok, where was I...aye, thats right, why are we losing the rhino, the elephant, the whale and shark..cos fucking Jimmy Nip and Chippy Chong need to grind down their horns, fins and testicles to get a fucking boner!!And we let them, cos we enjoy their plastic cheap shite at poundstretcher and fucking stereos!!!!
(the japanese government are currently in an International argument, saying they have to mass slaughter Whales ...get this.....for research!!! at which point they get asked,,,,so why don't you just tag them , dont you get a FUCKIN BONER THEN!!!!)
(Nb:this is true and if you care join the Greenpeace "save mr splashy pants campaign")
And you know what...we get Dolphin friendly cans of tuna....thats it....
right then, thats that vented...ffff....sorry bout the language, but I'm sure you'd also care if you watched your family shot, their horns removed and powered down so some impotent little prick can satisfy a "så kallad" toight Thai.
Now you see, if your religeous at all you'd start to understand why God has decided to throw the odd curve ball the only way he can, raining giant frogs, huge tidalwaves and of course the strangest of the strange , Gilbert, Wilma and Katrina...I mean, who names the strongest "killer" Hurricanes in history???not god anyway, he probably hears those names and mumbles obsenitys and then decides as he felt a name like "Tors hammer", "Slicer" and "Ripper" should have been used, he'd send another one, or wait, how about melt some of the icecap the next time President Bush signs a treaty against everything logical and wants the American car companys to build more SUV's....
Doesn't anyone get it? Animals, planet, weather....mix up the letters, write them on blotting paper and wash them at 60 degrees and when you get them out, just like the da vinci code you'll be very confused as to why the albino wears a potato sack and beats himself with a levi belt tightening a barbed wire jockstrap and of course , who shagged who?????
Got me anyways...

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

El Gath Gath (pronounced GAS GAS) on the mend.

Its a cluster fuck, stripped to the bone, nuts and bolts getting tastly, air tools by KUKEN, Japan being borrowed..DRZ suzuki cams being bought from the highlands of Scotland to strip for decompressor parts, yep, its a long story but the deadline is within 3 weeks.
So far and over a day, the engine is down to the guts, the r/h block needs replaced due to a crack in the waterhousing (hairline) and whilst having a dig around the gear selector fork a mysterious looking object was found...

With pawnshop eyes

Just a great set of words, made into a poem, made into a song.
Thats all..

With a pawnshop eyes and a second hand frown
She sat silent at the table
Her boots were brown, should she leave town
To play the role of lover ex-patriot
A nod to the waiter,always her flirty behavior,
You know she always gets one on the house
She pulls out a letter from a bag
Under her sweater and before she
Reads she straightens her blouse

Theres a passion in being alone a grace in a loveless time
Theres no new cross, theres no new sign
Only the sun and the changing tide

And out of respect, well really must confess
I never lost your number I never
Lost your address
And if we remain friends at best
Sometime later no, no not yet
Well smile and remember it like this

She put back the letter,one tear
Falls like a feather and disappears
On this bar room floor
The gratuity included, you know
The letter concluded

P.s. all my love

”Getting the “bla bla” down first”

Over 3000 years ago, a seedling took root in the dark leech-ridden forests of south west Tasmania.
As it grew, the world witnessed the birth of Christianity, the signing of the Magna Carta, the Industrial Revolution, the discovery of the New World and assorted plagues, wars and natural disasters. That seedling is today an almost fully grown member of one of the world’s longest living species - the Huon Pine.
Its extraordinary longevity is just one of the many qualities of the Huon Pine. The rare wood contains an oil that prevents it from rotting - it is seemingly indestructible. It is favoured by artists and fine furniture makers and its lightness, strength and close grain make it the “holy grail” of boat-building timber.
Huon Pine - Lagarostrobos franklinii, (formerly. Dacrydium franklinii) is only found in Tasmania Australia.

With unique qualities of durability, longevity, amazing grains, rich golden hues that darken with age and fine texture, Huon Pine is a truly beautiful softwood timber, deep in character with exquisite aroma. Huon Pine is extremely slow growing with growth rates averaging a mere 1mm per year. Trees may attain heights of over 40 metres and are amongst the longest living organisms on the earth, they often live in excess of 2000 years and have been known to reach 3,000 years. A tree merely 20 cm in diameter could be as much as 500 years old.

The ‘Piners’, early timber getters, searched the inhospitable wilderness of Tasmania's West Coast to cut and haul out Huon Pine logs. The timber was used for everything where durability and ease of working was required; in furniture and tables, in washtubs and ships and in machinery and patterns for casting. Remaining trees are found in the western and south-western parts of the state, growing along river banks, lake shores and swampy localities in mixed formations.

Huon Pine derives its name from the stands which once occurred along the Huon River. The western and south-western Huon Pine stands are now protected and what timber is available comes from logs salvaged from rivers and areas flooded by hydro electric schemes or logs that are dead fallen. This above personalised panorama piece from the Gordon River Dam contains evidence of being salvaged as parts contain an additional rich orange tannin stain which is drawn into the timber as it lays for years in the water.

Huon Pine is the prince of Tasmanian timbers, the richness of its golden colour and features such as ‘birds eye’ and ‘fiddleback’, make it one of the world's most desirable furniture and veneering timbers. Its durability and workability make it one of the best boat-building timbers known. The wood contains a natural preserving oil with an unmistakable perfume which is also a natural insect repelant, its fine and even grain makes the wood exceptionally pleasant to work with hand tools.

true investment in a piece that is already of great age. As the limited existing sources of flooded and dead fallen Huon Pine diminish, due to its extreme slow growth and protected status, Huon Pine can only become more difficult to obtain and thus, even rarer.

The picture.You get it right?

So now and again something catches your eye and you take another wee peak onto the virtual paper screen that flickers and you mark it down as something to look at before the auction is over. Your expecting the item to go for a higher price than the asking price and at the moment the piggy bank is sliced and in the frying pan.
So, after 7 days you see nobody has made a bid and your curious.
Then , at the same time your selling a 197X Yamaha TZ500/700 motorcycle hub and rim and you guessed it, the same buyer owns what you’ve been looking at.

So, by now you wanna know whats the guts with whats been looked at.

No surprise really, the song remains the same just now.

Life at 41 is about tone and sustain and things of beauty...oh, and of course that have a jackplug and pups that can be plugged in so one can actually use both eyes and ears on that tone and sustain as well as the ever so important resonance.
Yep...another guitar. You see, unlike Joe normal boring person I only have the bare essentials in my living room and as opposed to filling it with ikea cardboard I'm going wall to wall woods and steel strings. Each corner adorned with a different story, different year, different sound. At the moment we have two Gibsons, a fender and a univox. And soon to join the guitar which a certain luthier decided to build and which is a one off...for many reasons, as the wood only exists on one island in the world and is not allowed to be chopped down, the man in question obvioulsy ended up with a chunk and made an exact copy of an early 60's fender Stratocaster body.As his work was guitars, he obviously had bits and bobs sitting around, and to the one off body he added a 1963 pre cbs maple neck as well as certain other items from an L series strat.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

"so.....gettin old......"

So do you ever get down to the laundry room too early, say 4 minutes , so you can't be bothered to go back up to your place, and the first thing you do is crouch down and look at the laundry going round and round...I've always wondered why...
Next time it happens though, try and remember your first initil thoughts...mine tend to be scenes from films where somebodys head or a cat has ended up in the machine..

So whats that gotta do with gettin old, obviously nothing. However, you do tend to analyse things more and more.

Last couple a months, since november to be exact, and I've been in and out of x-ray rooms, emptying myself with toilax micro laxative, not eating for 24 hours for examinations and burning my guts on too many perscriptions. So it hasn't been easy and I'm now up for an ultrasound on my pancreas.Lifes been tough and without training its a bear with really bad headache.
With my resignation as National coach and the incoming guitars and more guitars, and of course the comhem tv channels, I've kinda gone backwards in the evolution.

The more time I thought I'd have for training is bye the bye and instead I've put all my energy into trying to play and retaining my sanity. Although, now with the garage doors swung open, the amp valves warming up and the weather changing, I'm hoping for a brighter future.
One of the problems faced with anything in the "petrolhead"void is the chassis, and mine is broken for the now.

It's funny though, as despite my age some things just haven't changed.I stood waiting for the number 60 bus, TZ racing wheel in hand, UFO's version of "Doctor Doctor" blasting in my headcans whilst I plan the building of a 71 Les Paul Custom and at the same time trying to focus on two business trips that require pre-study to Dubai and Switzerland.My back is aching and it suddenly dawns on me, standing there with a smile and strumming my pick hand, that the mix is fantastic between the mental and the pysical, always keeping me in check. The chassis is rusty and hopefully the panel beaters and rust repairers (Roger Daltreys first job) and I realise that around every corner is an anxiety regarding the next pathway, but all in all, its great to have somehow found the DeLorean from "Back to the future" and been caught, back in reverse!

Hurricane Katrina meets a Gibson 69'ner

Things are easy if you have money.
However, maybe you have more fun if you need to work hard and build pieces , or find a skill and improve on it.
A good condition 69 Gibson SG will set you back around $6000.So, if you don't have that kinda money the next best thing is to find a relic and start the hunt for parts.
Its a gamble obviously, as the neck on this one fell off and the whole guitar got reliced under the influence of Hurricane Katrina, The killer Hurricane that killed thousands and destroyed billions and billions. Still, its got history, the neck has been repaired and ok, it looks like crap but its old wood, and thats one thing you just can muck about with.It's a bit like experience, you really have to have the years before you get the suss, although some people really thing they can cheat that equation, which says it all really that they don't have the experience to see you cant.

So, its out there with a price tag..the 71 les paul (c earlier) is on its way so I'm not sure if I need another project, But I'd love to stick some soapbar p90's in it with a badass tail...ala townshend.

"Big Wheels Keep on turnin...."

It's interesting just how many thoughts come through the bottleneck when your standing at a wee shelter in the middle of nowwhere awaiting a bus.Its saturday and the number of buses to the ends of this "earth" can be counted on one paw, so I missed one and have 90 minutes to wait..of course I'm too scared to go back in the workshop for fear that "just perhaps" a bus turns out.
So, its a nice evening and the ipod is charged, and in the middle of this surreal situation I have a 1975 Yamaha TZ500 wheel to take home and weigh up, a beautiful rock breaker Estwing and japanese butterfly blade for company. The butterfly blade was found amongst all my junk and is basically a remembrance from my young teen years where I bought this one in Geneva just to see if I could carry off the spin.The Estwing is from Colorado and the wheel comes from an early project in 87.It's now a rarity, just try and find one on Google or ebay for sale.So I'm letting it go and have to weigh up to ship...anyway, back to the shelter and the ipod. I ran " The Rocky Horror Picture show" theres a classic for those of you around th weirdos in the 80s.
To this day Theatres in America run the show and the cult following is incredible.So, there I stood, suns going down, wheel under one arm, a Musical about transvestites and smelling of burned rubber and old oil.
Rewind five days earlier:
Okay, some people would argue your not a man until you've done this and that, kinda changes with the crowd. Well, I'd say you if you've never removed a tyre from an alloy rim with a high beaded edge, you just don't know the concept of "steaming ears"...bloody hell, draw blood first so you don't get disappointed..I even tried to cut through the tyre just to break the bead, but not luck. 1 hour and a ruptured disk later and the bleeder was ready to take off..sweating bullets and blood shot eyes. Its about this time you really need some time in the "quiet room" with Vince Furnier, aka Alice Cooper, with the plastic knives and forks..
The "to do" list today included removing a tyre, washing the racing gear with a view to sell and of course finally the most fun job, stripping down the gasgas 450 supermotard engine.
Cutting a long story short, sometimes you understand why pneumatic airtools were invented..
deadline for the start up after the camchain snapped, is the end of the month.However, I found what looked like the end of a shifter fork bangin around the bottom of the casings..we shall see, I'm borrowing an air tool tomorrow.
The Now:
So it took me around 3 hours to get home. The irony of carrying a wheel along and getting a bus, it got more attention than I did anyway. The evening ends with the usual Volteraine suppository before the back seizes up and suddenly I wake up from a 3 hour daze to the whistling of the old fashioned tea kettle, realising that old age has finally caught up..but thats the next blog, read on..