The Immaculate Conception of ....come again?

So the travelling is on again and once gain I’m standing beside a train with a fake grin on my face as a couple pick up a pram with a screaming kid still sitting in it, the ultimate curling föräldrar(?) and behind me a young girl trys to control a rather angry Doberman pincher who obviously isn’t enjoying the prospect of a trip..join the q buddy. As a voice reigned over the tannoy that the cattle had to get into the wagon as quickly as possible I looked at a bloke in a wheelchair looked bemused as to how he was gonna get on the train.Not sure if he ever did actually.

This trip will of course the launch the obtaining of a new laptop which in turn means I can script whilst on the go. Once again it’s a sad day to see the back of the IBM T21 wich has done formidable service since 98 and still works a treat, it’s the 10gb hardisk, PIII , 750PIII processor that’s getting a bit old tooth and of course on trips without an electrical outlet the thing dies immediately as soon as its meant to go over to battery. It’s the old tale of even my old laptop has a soul, despite being plastic and indeed also has a story.

I cannot reiterate just how things have changed within a few decades and the fact that I can now download 15 records of my favourite French band in a rar zipped folder and listen to everyone whilst on a train that if I want I can plug into the internet and surf to which ever country I want in the world is completely taken for granted..
NB: as I am writing this a rather chubby chucker just managed to spill orange juice on me which in turn missed my keyboard by inches…for those of you who didn’t already know the only genuine killer of electronics is orange juice…so despite the fact that I’ve had an orange cum shot on myself she survived. I will refrain from further abuse as I see she is sitting quite close in a pale clowd of over nourishment and was obviously caught up in the “must get a tattoo” phase of a few years ago of a funny little character on her haunch…

I really enjoying driving and my next conquest is to get a Honda s2000 and never take public transport again. I have to admit though the rat poison worked on the dog as well as the whiskey in the milk bottle. only joking.I have had enough abuse actually the past few days. Bleedin check to say that I take life as a joke, I mean really.

Just listening to some old dears sitting in the seats next to me. Have you ever noticed that the elderly seem to be obsessed with time? They seem to get really into details and they’re good at pointing them out. I suppose it must be such a new world for them. I mean, I find it kinda sad in a way how things have “moved on” , so I can imagine someone with another 25 years on mine. What a blogg!

Actually, details and simplicity should be the name of my book. No idea why, a minor detail right there I suppose…
Attention to detail is always a frightening concept, entering almost a world of “American Pyscho”..Its a bit like our new word for office donkey –project leader. Attention to detail- compulsive obsessionist.Is that a word?- I’ll get me coat.

Nice to know that one of my blogg readers has once again blessed the blogg with so many derisoury comments that I can’t understand why she bothers. Now it’s the Damp Blogg. This is of course from the very same person who wanted me to drop dead. As I never read over what I write I can imagine it is all swings and roundabouts and has enough dips and tips as “the Big Dipper” of Blackpool pre 80.

*The big Dipper- so called as it had at that time ,Europes steepest dip after the start . When I was a lad my single mother took my brother and I to Blackpool and we would go on all those rides including the Dipper. Of course, you’d have to be certified now to step on one of the wooden trolleys that went around this roller coaster. If you sat in the front wagon the front wheels lifted at points and sat at the back and the rear lifted at others. So it was always a case of “Mr and Mrs Shiturpants”. Quite a few of those old amusement rides have now been outlawed and I reckon they’re either dismantled or worst still ended up in Russia or a neighboring country to Mother R. Scarey thought…
I mean to say, Balder and all the rest is fun, but it’s comfort zone compared to a wooden trolley with 4 rusty train wheels on a jalopy track. Of course I write in hindsight.
I wonder what the circus is like nowadays. Are you also one of those people that always see’s the advertising posters but never actually sees the tent. I always notice those posters as I have a thing for clowns. I think they’re frightening in a some weirdo way. I reckon its Stephen King and “It” but I’m not sure for I cannot remember ever finding a clown character amusing me whilst pretending to throw a bucket of water but its actually bits of paper..Or the big shoes and kicking each others backsides whilst blowing a large horn…quick example, google ;famous mass murders / clown..
Wonder what makes you want to become a clown and join the circus. I know, it’s a family generation hand me down. Thanks Dad, thanks Mum, I’ll just got rip some bits of paper and make sure the water is filled in the squirting flower…There has to be inbreeding in the circus acts of Europe otherwise they would die out in this digital world. I suppose Ringmaster is an in joke in Circus circles. The bearded lady and the ringmaster invite you to drinks in caravan 3 , due to the lack of space dwarfs will be required to stand…please stand up…

Ok ok, sick sense of humour, and already informed that I shouldn’t take life as a joke and that’s all I do. That’s not true but at the same time I do seem to have inherited some ancient Scottish disease called “takkin the rise”. In the quarters I was brought up all humour was based on taking the piss outta everyone and everything. I seem to be caught in a rut- for the last 30 years..
If there was one thing I would declare I miss it’s the sense of humour. Of course Scandinavia has it’s own rare type of humour which after years of personal research I have discovered it’s based around the fact that they can mix the letter w and V without actually realising…
So you get, “ we are wikings… we eat wegetables…”…Just doesn’t work when you get some large blonde kiddo giving the old “Vi r Wikings”…the come back is of course, “wot a buncha Vankers”.
On a more serious note the humour is interesting , sarcasm and cynicism goes down like cheap Bulgarian wine. This can be alarming especially in relationships when they don’t know if your kidding or not. Every suggestion becomes a question mark and mas debate…
Eg;
“Ville du åker till Ikea på Sondag”
Why, that sounds like fun. We should go to Ikea more often, it’s so much fun..
Vad menar du med det? Ville du inte åker med, eller?
Sure, always enjoy the crowds, we can play happy famly who can’t find anything else constructive to do at the weekend. Whats next, planned sex on “myss” Friday after a bath with scented candles…
Hejdå!
Ok, bye

It’s around this time I realise that someone will be stomping their feet and stating the fact that there is nothing wrong with a planned trip to Ikea, that sometimes you have to plan the sex on a Friday as we’re too tired through the week as “desperate housewifes” and “House” can’t be missed as well as the other “Stories” and that scented candles and a bath are very romantic. Then of course comes the cutting remark that I’m as romantic as a splinter under a toe nail. And of course I would agree that there is nothing wrong with the above if that is the way you wanna go. I have yet to find a bath that takes two people and things remain romantic…usually “fredags/lordags godis” put an end to that…

Well I suppose if I’m unfortunate I’ll end up like Jacque Mesrine.

Ever wondered how the algorithms work in a zipped file. How they compress 5megabytes down to 900Kb depending on the program.
Ever wondered how the strings in C++ work to pull together lines of programming that run programs. Java programming or is it still something to do with Indonesia.
Why do I ask?
Question is, why do some care and wonder and others simply accept and get on.
I tend to rate in the 2 and 3 dimensional state.
2 dimensional is very flat. Obvious. Almost a shallow level to be working at., just scratching at the surface of basically anything, from hobby to personality.
3 dimensional is getting deeper, more into someone or something.
Analogy could be a coal mine(or gold mine). Question is are you starting the dig or is the lift already in place and ready to take you down it’s levels.
To dig deeper is gonna take more hard work without knowing if there is any gold/coal down there. So the first choice is if your willing to work hard enough to go past the 2 dimension. A classic example hear is the attraction game. You get pissed, you see a girl through the bottom of your empty jar and you move in based on..the 2 dimension. So does she, so no need to worry, your either in or out as you haven’t got your tool out yet (?).(I suppose your waiting for her to help you there)
If we move away from that and look at the one difference between many its not rocket science, its rather simple. Why? Thats all it is. Some people ask the question why and follow it up with how. Reading articles about Einstein and his theories are fairly amazing as it’s all based around a starting point where he asked himself why, how come, and follows it up dedicating himself so well that he ends up hanging out with Marilyn Monroe !